Cultivating Calmness in the Car
If you missed the last couple weeks of this series you can find the links here:
Cultivating Calmness: Turn Down the Noise
Cultivating Calmness: 1 Simple Step to Calmer Mornings
I watched as my husband carefully loaded the car seat into the car and latched it into place. Our newborn baby was already fussing and I was exhausted. The sounds that were coming from my precious little one nearly sent me into a panic attack as I wondered how in the world I was going to care for this new life. She screamed the entire way home. I unbuckled the car seat and gently took her into my arms and I cried. I think we both cried for the next six months. Ha! Seriously.
We have had many car rides since that day over nine years ago, some crazy and some quiet. I have heard that some babies like to sleep in the car and their parents will take them for a late night drive just to soothe them to sleep. For us, our first child never adjusted to enjoying a car ride. No one prepared me for car rides with a child who was throwing things my way, screaming at the top of her lungs or stripping off shoes, hair bows and anything else she could manage to wiggle out of. I have vivid memories of pulling over on the side of the road to let her know she better straighten up. I have slightly slammed on the brakes to jolt her to attention. I even waved my right arm like a windmill trying to reach for her behind the seat. Car rides were difficult for my independent toddler and me.
Now that my children are a little older and we have grown beyond temper tantrums and throwing things at the driver (for the most part), we have been able to establish some routines that have helped us have a smoother adventure when we venture out. If you are still in the baby stage and you happen to have a child who does not love the car, take my word for it, there is hope!
If you have a child or two that do not make car rides pleasant, here are a few ideas to calm the chaos in the car:
Have a car ride routine.
Here is our most recent routine:
– We pray on the way, even if it is only a five-minute ride to Target. We all take turns praying. Sometimes we reach our destination by the time prayers are complete and no one has had an opportunity to antagonize each other or act up.
…Lord, Teach us to pray…Luke 11:1(NASB)
– We study our Awana books. Awana is a scripture memory program at our church. The kids know when we get in the car, the Awana books come too.
I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. Psalm 119:11(NIV)
– We listen to Christian music and sometimes we dance. There is nothing like a child’s voice singing praises to Jesus. My kids have their favorite songs and when those songs come on the radio, we crank up the music. This is much more fun than arguing.
Oh sing to the LORD a new song; sing to the LORD, all the earth! Psalm 96:1(ESV)
– If all of our efforts of a calm car ride fail, we sit in the silence. Yes, you heard that right – silence. If we have attempted our routine above, and attitudes are blaring or feelings are being hurt, we have quiet time.
You’ve heard the old saying, “If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”
Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. Ephesians 4:29(KJV)
Car rides forever changed once I brought my first newborn home. Our strategies have morphed through the years from Cheerios and chicken nuggets to praying and singing. No, we are not perfect, just doing the best we can to keep everyone safe, singing and enjoying a little silliness.
Do car rides bring stress into your day? Try a new routine. Give it a couple of weeks before you give up. You might be surprised what it will do to transform your chaotic car rides to calm.
If you have some fun games or ideas that your family enjoys in the car, please share them in the comments below! I would love to hear what works for your family!
How will your car rides look this week? Calm or crazy?
We probably look a little crazy because we are that family who sings and dances in the car. What about you?
Love & Blessings,
Micah
If this has been an encouragement to you please LIKE, SHARE & COMMENT so others can be encouraged too!
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My babies and toddlers HATED any car ride, no matter the length. Have mercy! There is nothing like being completely frazzled by the time ou reach your destination. Thankfully, my kiddos have grown out of it but my 2 year old still has days where she would rather let us know how unhappy she is strapped into her car seat. One of my favorite ways to distract her is to turn the music up loud and that seems to make everyone into a happier attitude. I do love your pray suggestion, I will have to give that a try!
I totally get it! Toddlers are tough. I’ve had my share of blaring music rides haha!
Car rides can be crazy town! Thanks for your tips. We also like to listen to audio books from the library and have a car game book (ideas like eye spy, etc.) that we keep on hand. Happy trails Micah:)
Love these ideas, Meg!
Excellent tips! My kids may argue more in the car than any other place. Music, books, and dance helps a lot! Visiting from #LifeGivingLinkUp!
Thanks, Kelly! Yes, we love books too!
Definitely a challenge to keep everyone calm in the car! I find that the cooler I remain no matter what happens, the quicker any conflict gets sorted out. No easy feat when slamming on the brakes and yelling is what I really want to do, but when I rely on God’s strength to calm myself first the effects are obvious. We also listen to a LOT of audio stories to keep everyone’s mind occupied. Visiting from Soul Survival.
Yes, my attitude affects the entire crew! No doubt! Thanks for bringing up this point. I find this to be true in every area of our lives. If I stay calm usually the situation does not escalate to such an ordeal. Thanks for chiming in!
My kids are both grown now but I sure could have used these tips when they were young! They had a problem with fighting in the backseat of the truck while we were on the road.
I remember butting my head up against my brothers and pushing for dear life. This is why I got a mini van. Everyone has their space and they won’t be butting heads as much haha!
Smart move! :)
Ahhhhhh… yes! The car rides. I think I’ve locked a few of them away in the vault area of my brain! Ha! Great post!
Blessings and smiles,
Lori
Haha! Lori, too funny! Thanks for dropping in.
These sound like some great ideas, Micah, for calmer car rides!
Oh, how I remember singing Cubbie verse songs all the way to church (25 minutes)!
My kids are in college now, and I still like things to be calm in the car!
Found you on Messy Marriage today.
Hope you have a blessed day~
Melanie
Melanie, I love that! Thanks for joining us!
Hi Micah. I love your super suggestions for helping to keep things calm in the car when travelling with little ones. I’ll be bearing them in mind should my grandson act up and we need some strategies for keeping him calm. Thanks for the advice! Blessed by my visit from Tell His Story. :)
Joy, I’m sure your grandson is exceptional! The sweet boy probably never acts up ;). So good to meet you!
Great memories! (and some not so great!)
We love recorded books, and now that I’m running homeschooled kids from Dan to Beersheeba all the time, we listen to chapter books, and I’m just as entertained and engaged as the kids!
Adventures in Odyssey is also a great series!
Adventures in Odyssey is great! Thanks, Michelle!
Oh yes, sometimes there is no talking anymore, bu there is usually still singing in our car :)
I do love music! It takes a lot for me turn it off.
Great ideas, Micah! I wish I had thought of going around & all praying in the car when my kids were smaller. :) We do a lot of praise songs in the car & some car rides, listen to our History CD’s for homeschool, and we also go around & tell things we’re thankful for. Love this post!
Angela, we do the “tell what you’re thankful for” too! Always fun to hear what they have to say especially when they say they are thankful for mom :). Thanks for stopping by!
I agree ….when I am taking my children to school I usually plug in my phone and we listen to scriptures on the journey and then before they get our the car we say a prayer together before they head off in to school. When we forget to do it the journey is much different… and I feel like my kids are being packed off to school unprotected.
It’s amazing the difference prayer can make! We serve a mighty, loving, living God!
Great tips Micah. Blessings
Thanks, Stacey!
I really like the idea of a routine for the car. My kids have a few books and toys and generally do quite well, but we all have our days. I wish I could pull off quiet time for more than 2 minutes…..guess it will come with practice and age (my kiddos are still young!). Praying and awana verses are both excellent ideas that I will definitely have to try.
Yes, it will get easier in many ways with age. But enjoy the littleness!
Even though I don’t have littlies in the car sometimes the rush to get ready does great some tension – we could all do with this reminder. I remember one time the kids and I were in the car and caught in a big storm. I was so scared that other cars, especially trucks wouldn’t see me – I pulled off to a side road where there was no traffic and sat there praying and singing. It was to calm my heart more than anything. When the storm was done, the kids said – wasn’t that fun! I guess that was my second reason – I didn’t want them to know how scared I really was. There could be any time of our day where your new routine would serve to bring calm to the stress.
What a great story! I love that, Belinda! I think that’s how God works with us sometimes. He sings over us through the storm and carries us to the other side. What a beautiful picture of God’s comforting peace. Thank you so much for sharing that with us today! That made my day!