Why Worry?
Worry is not desirable, yet I often choose it, even fight for it.
I actually despise the feeling I get deep in my gut when something is disturbing my normal. It’s hard to articulate exactly what ignites this feeling. Sometimes it only takes a word, a sight, a smell or a sound to bring up memories of past problems that make me feel physically ill. The feelings of worry are familiar.
I don’t want to feel this way, but I don’t know how to escape. If I could break free from worry I would feel so much better. The weight of worry weighs me down. I do not know if I can take it another day.
I kissed my sweet baby goodbye wondering if it would be the last time I would look into her precious eyes. I watched as they rolled her bed into the sterile room.
I made my way to waiting room and I worried. I prayed in that waiting room, but I still worried. I took my desires before the throne of God, but I still held on to my worries. I worried about the “what ifs.” What if it was the last time? What if God was going to take her? What if something goes wrong? What if her body doesn’t comply with the procedure? I worried. I prayed. I worried some more.
I wanted to give it to God. I thought by praying that I was doing the right thing. Looking back, I realize my prayer though sincere, was lacking.
If I truly believed and trusted that God was in control of the situation I would not have worried. Although I know it’s natural to worry in uncertain circumstances, God is not natural. He is supernatural. He is beyond what our human minds can comprehend.
He knows what every moment of our life will look like before it happens. When problems, trials and loss breech our hopeful plans, He is not surprised, in shock or caught off guard.
When I worry I am saying, I don’t fully trust that God knows every detail. My mind says He does, but reality makes me question. The thoughts that fill my mind say that it is natural for a mother to be filled with care and concern for her child. If I’m honest my care and concern goes much farther and distinctively resembles a word that I don’t like to admit, worry.
I have a confession. My name is Micah and I worry. It’s not something I’m proud of or want, but it’s true.
There have been times that I have completely released control and allowed God to fully comfort me. It’s those times that make me realize how often I struggle clinging tightly to my own control. I know I should trust. I know I should let go. It’s difficult.
I glance down at my hands that are clenched tightly to my own desires and my white knuckles remind me of my humanness. If I could just relax and trust God, I could be at rest. Why do I fight? Why do I worry?
If the Holy Spirit dwells within my human body, when I clench my fists and tighten my jaw I begin to fight with the strength that indwells my own being. If I give over control, the power and presence of the Holy Spirit literally lifts the load of my worry. He already knows the outcome. He already sees my tomorrow. Why do I fight the strength that lives within me?
I am thankful for the supernatural, powerful comforting presence of God. I will still have moments (maybe even days) of unnecessary worry, but when I see my white knuckles I will remember to stop fighting. I will allow the Holy Spirit to do the lifting and I will rest in the fullness of His glory and peace.
Fighting is exhausting. Resting brings peace. Why worry?
For in Him dwelleth all the fullness of the Godhead bodily. And ye are complete in Him, which is the head of all principality and power. Philippians 2:9-10
No matter what you are facing today, God’s power and peace is accessible to you. Let go of the gut wrenching pain that goes along with worry and rest in the presence of God. He already knows your tomorrow.
What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee. Psalm 56:3
But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19
Love & Blessings,
Micah
P.S. My sweet girl’s procedure was routine and I have kissed her precious face a million times since.
Page with Comments
Comments are closed.
Micah,
As I pondered this topic of worry, I kept coming back to King David. He experienced the full gamet of emotions yet still looked to God with the confident expectation to see God’s face and experience victory. That I would be so faithful with this emotion of worry.
Samantha, yes I love what David writes in ️Psalm 27 The Lord is my light and my salvation whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life of whom shall I be afraid? Worry is a tough one for me, but learning every day to trust, rest and fully give it all over to Him. Thank you for that good reminder about David! Love & Blessings.
I love that scripture from Psalms! I totally get that feeling- isn’t concern for our children normal? Worry is normal, right? But just like you said, there’s nothing like to feeling of releasing worry to Him. Thanks Micah!
Kristine, Yes, got to just let it go. When we do it’s amazing to watch God orchestrate it. Love & Blessings!
Yes- God is supernatural which means he does not worry. And I can have the mind of Christ. It’s hard to let go especially with those we love. #livefree
Astrid, exactly. Thanks for visiting from #livefree! Thankful for a God who knows every detail!
Micah, wow I’m so glad the procedure went well. Your family is so beautiful. Thanks for sharing your heart and uplifting verses to help me #livefree. Have a great day! Kim Stewart
http://www.kimstewartinspired.com
Kim, thanks so much! God is so faithful. You have a great day too! Love & Blessings!
Great reminder to “Let go and let God” thanks Micah great blog.
It’s interesting how you connected worry with control. I think that’s powerful. Surrender is the opposite of control, so perhaps we worry less when we surrender more. I love this, Micah! Thanks for being a part of #livefreeThursday.
Suzie, thanks so much for reading! Surrender! Yes! That word used to be so difficult. It’s comforting. So thankful to connect with you and the other amazing writers through #livefreeThursday! Thank you for providing us a place to come together.
I completely agree with Suzie about the control. If it is something there is no way I could be expected to control (tsunami, earthquake, major illness, zombie attack), I am perfectly good with turning it over to God to handle. No worries. He’s got me covered.But I should be able to stretch a dollar, budget my time, think more clearly, etc. “Aargh, how am I going to fix this?! I want to control it and will worry myself into knots trying to do so. The crazy thing is that the root of it all is FEAR.
Oh, this digging deep is nasty stuff sometimes!
Thanks so much for a well-written piece.
Angela, thanks for reading and for your transparent comments! Yes control…fear…I really need Jesus to rest and truly release it all.
Hi Micah! Coming over from Suzie’s link-up. I love this thought, “Although I know it’s natural to worry in uncertain circumstances, God is not natural. He is supernatural. He is beyond what our human minds can comprehend.” This is a great way to think about worry…even when it feels natural, it doesn’t have to be our natural tendency, when our supernatural God is holding us and EVERYTHING in His very capable hands. <3
Amen, Meredith! So thankful. Worry has exhausted me too many times.
He already sees my tomorrow. Why do I fight the strength that lives within me?– I love those words, Micah. Nice to link up with you, today.
Thanks Jessica! To God be the Glory!
I felt a kindredness to you as I too am a fellow worrier with similar thoughts and bents. Worry, unfortunately, consumed my life in the past and can rear it’s ugly head even still.
It’s interesting, but I find the really big problems, the ones that I truly comprehend as out of my control, it is there that I find rest and peace in the Lord. But the smaller, day to day worries, those are the ones I want to control, with the false sense, that I can be in control of them… But our times are in God’s hands for our good and His glory.
For God gave us a spirit not of fear, but of power and love and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7
Thank you for sharing!
Karen that’s one of my favorite verses! Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this topic! To God be the glory in the big and the small things! Love & Blessings to you!
Stopping over from Suzie’s #livefree. Loved your thoughts on worry…grateful to know I’m not alone. Worry is a bugger is it not! So glad your sweet girl is doing well! Blessings!
Cindy, thanks so much! Yes, we are in this together! Love & Blessings
Micah, “Taking every thought captive” and releasing our worry to God is so hard. But how beautiful is that “peace that surpasses understanding” when we do! Thank you for sharing. Blessings to you!
Thanks for reading! Yes that peace is amazing. So thankful! Love & blessings to you.
When you enter the world of worry, you have entered a place I travel into and out of on a regular basis. I then add self-condemnation to my burden of worry because God’s Word tells me not to worry, not to be anxious, not to fear. But, as I wrote in a blog post not too long ago… sometimes I need to know what TO DO, in place of what I’m being told what NOT TO DO. You hit the nail on the head. Trust. Believe. Thank you for your transparency and your beautiful reminder that worry will come, but our Deliverer is at hand!
Our Deliverer is at hand! Yes! Thanks for joining in the conversation, Janet!